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I eat woodland creatures

A Blog Post for GameBanana

When I was driving home tonight I saw a bunch of deer timidly waiting at the edge of the road to cross. I stopped to shoo them away and they looked at me with their evil little eyes. It was quite clear that if they could speak, they would sound like pissed off pedestrians. This brings up a story I must tell, even if I've told it before. Story 1 About this time last year I was driving my dad's 94' Honda Accord. Out of nowhere a deer decides to commit suicide on the hood of it. Oh well, suicidal deer can't be stopped. Unfortunately, my low rate of speed did not kill him on impact. I never let good food go to waste, and there was a decent sized hunting knife in the vehicle, so we were having deer steaks for the better part of a week. Story 2 6 months later, I was driving my pick-em-up truck, and once again a deer made a poor life decision. Only this time, I had no knife. I had a tire iron, and frankly, I was sick of these damn deer. A few good bludgeons to the head knocked that bastard out. Animal cruelty? Maybe, but I'm sick of those damn deer.
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  • Marcus Fenix avatar
    Marcus Fenix Joined 13y ago
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    access_time 13y
    I'd kill to see deer on the road that common. Shit Florida is shit. I cant blame you for the first one but the second one is something you'd find on the news XD. Why didn't you just get some sharp object and shove it into its temple and end its misery?... Dem's good eaten.
    Pyro is a dude stop dreaming. avatar
    Mantra
    Pyro is a dude stop dreaming.
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